story about a dude that rejected by a hot girl and the movie shows him trying to win her over and at the end it turns out the hot girl is a lesbian and she had a crush on this chubby girl the dude totally rudely rejected earlier and the two super cute girls smooch and the dude cries and no one gives a shit
what do birds do
I apologise for my ignorance, birds are important
Stop Chris Pratt before it’s too late 2k14
Coming up with schemes with your best friend
Was this movie even real
HOW DOES AN 80 YEAR OLD WOMAN HAVE THE SAME CARDIO AS FIT ATHLETIC MUSCLE MAN THIS SHOW MAN
a dude turned into a llama and you’re questioning why an old lady is as fit as a muscly guy
i hate when babies cry like grow the fuck up and pay taxes
if it’s late enough and you’re lonely enough, the carly rae jepsen lyric “before you came into my life i missed you so bad” starts seeming increasingly deep and emotionally complex
3:02 AM and this fucking lyric looks like fucking nietzsche
stare into the abyss and the abyss will call you maybe
"Also, did you see my ginormous
life tip whatever dumb ass name you get siri to call you is what your iphone automatically signs your emails as. i have been applying to jobs for 2 months as queef.
"YOU SICK BASTARD" I shout
Jon Snow starts to cry. He has been fighting off this flu for a week and has been eating lots of citrus. He’s doing his best.
so my dad’s friend was bartending and saw a guy put something in a girl’s drink so while the guy turned around he switched their drinks and watched the guy roofie himself.
this is my linen closet, *shows you some towels*
and this is my lenin closet *shows you communist propaganda*